Take a look. I dare you.

Iddy Biddy

“Iddy! I have a snack!” I heard the Girl- Sara calling from across the land. Iddy Biddy. Of all the glorious names that exist, like Sir Scamps, the Nutcatcher, even Odin, I get stuck with Iddy Biddy. Oh well. Humans (Sara is teaching me the proper words) never have had the best imaginations- after all, who would believe me?

Once she saw me she started towards me I had to overcome my natural instinct of flight over fight for a second, and I cursed myself for the same length of time. She feeds me, I have no reason to be scared of this human. I scampered over and the fresh aroma of pine nuts wafted my way, and when I got even closer I could smell the goldfish- my favorite! Before she could put the basket down to present to me I was already inside it, shoving a goldfish cracker in my mouth.

“You’ve lost a bit of fur on your tail!” she exclaimed, peeking through the top o the basket.

“Just a nasty run-in with the family is all, nothing to worry about. I’m fine!” I shoved a second goldfish in my mouth and let out another contented sigh. “Oh the things I do for you,” I thought to myself, looking at the rest of my meal with a grin.


“There was a body found near the Spokane River early this morning, just West of Canada Island. The police have no comment, but we have heard there were no fingerprints or DNA found on the scene, simply a small tuft of fur held tightly between his fingertips. We will update you all as soon as we know more,” the broadcaster said solemnly on the TV at Sara’s place.

I glanced across the table at Sara, who was perched in her chair, staring intently at the screen. Poor thing couldn’t stand to see anyone get hurt no matter how foul that creature is.

“Perhaps he deserved it,” I offered to try to make it all right. I’m still relatively new to the whole conversation thing, “and maybe he died quickly.”

“Maybe,” her glum reply sounded hollowly.

She stood up and started getting ready for bed- my queue to leave. I bade her goodnight and crawled through the cracked window, back onto the tree, and into the outside world. Time to go to my home; it was getting pretty late.

“Just enough time for a short detour,” I thought to myself as I saw the man on the street below. I don’t know who he was, but he had something like a stick- it was shiny and grey and very scary, but it was no match for me. My teeth tore through his throat like sharp rocks can slice through flesh (I pride myself in my razor front teeth). He fell to the ground, gasping, grasping his throat, just like the other. While he lay there, struggling with Death, I took his shiny stick and hid it. I don’t like being scared, I can only imagine how Sara would react if she had seen it.

“Another job well done!” I happily exclaimed to myself as I scampered down the street. My happy humming gradually overpowered the sounds of the man gurgling as the distance grew. Out of sight, out of mind as they say.


“Another body was found in the downtown Spokane area last night, and once again officials say nothing. Is this the start of a serial killer?” I clicked the TV off and ran to cuddle with Sara.

“A serial killer?!” Her fear was obvious, like small daggers in my equally tiny heart.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure it’s nothing.”

“I hope so. That last guy was found a block from here.” Next time I should be further away from Sara. I need to be more careful.

“You’ll be safe! I’m here to protect you!” I exclaimed stoically, making her giggle.

“Iddy you’re just a squirrel,” she teased, “you should be more interested in taking care of protecting yourself.”

I’m not quite sure she’ll ever understand how special this seems to be, her and me, so I just smiled and gave my head a nod. Part of why I’ve written this is so maybe she will understand, but humans are easily daft- no offense Sara.

That night I spent the night at her place. My tail was twitching, which usually meant something bad was going to happen nearby, and I wanted to be ready. Feigning sleep I waited for Sara to doze off and I began my patrol.

I started in her bedroom, circling closets, under the bed- anything that would seem off or out of place. Her room was clear, time for the rest of the rooms. I easily slipped through the barely cracked door and made my way to the living room; nothing looked or smelled different- then I heard a footstep. Then another. Inside the house. They were trying to be quiet but my hearing is too great (I say they because I heard two different people). Slowly I stalked towards them, and I saw my guess was right as two people entered the hall adjacent me. With Sara sleeping in the other room there was no time to think so I acted.

The bigger man fell first. I nipped at his knees, biting through his tendons and down he went, I followed, clawing at all the soft places where he would bleed out fast and painfully. The second man almost picked me off the first man, but I was too fast. I bit his hand, ran up his arm, and as I chewed at his neck my back feet clawed out his eyes. The second man fell as well.

If I were bigger I would have been able to handle it quieter. That’s only important because their screams woke Sara up. I fled the apartment before she saw me, but who else could have done it? I took her little talking thing, and have been typing this all night. I’m lucky this note thing was open since I don’t really know how to use this stuff.

This is sort of my confession Sara. I killed those four men. The first one was following you to the park where we always meet. I would have told you I live in a nest two buildings from your place but I enjoy following you to the store where you buy me treats. I don’t know why the man started following you, but I stopped him- and lost a bit of fur though.

The second man was at the end of the block when I saw him, and I heard him say your name as he drew a shiny stick thing- I couldn’t let him get near you of course. Now this. I don’t know who’s after you or why, but after tonight I’m sure you know I killed those men, and I understand if you don’t want to see me again, I was only trying to keep my one friend safe.

-Iddy Biddy the Squirrel


Thank you Ashley for the idea for the story.

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